The Taiwan Addendum

Note: This article was originally supposed to be posted on Voyage to Asia as a "sequel" to my post about China hosted on that blog. Since the owner of that blog has not posted this article, I have decided to post it here.

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I think that I will be the first to write about Taiwan on this blog. It is an honor and a privilege.

When my generation thinks of East Asia, we tend to think of the Hallyu Wave of Korea, the anime and video games of Japan, and the ancient culture and economy of China. There is, however, one country that is often overlooked. This country is Taiwan, also known as the Republic of China, or “the other China that uses U.S.-manufactured weapons”. At any rate, my ten days in this island nation whetted my appetite for more exploration.

I arrived in Taiwan broken and battered. I did not want to leave Mainland, but my time was up, and my “Hail Mary” attempt at finding employment in Guangzhou did not succeed. However, thanks to a very close friend of mine, my adventure in East Asia would continue for a few more memorable days.

The instant that I touched down at the airport in Taipei, I realized that things seemed a lot less gritty than in Mainland. That is not said to put down Mainland China, as in all honesty, the grittiness has its appeal, but the environment in Taiwan made me feel a bit more at ease. To top things off, the food felt a lot better going down in comparison to some of the things that I had in China that tasted great, but made me suffer later.

One of the first things that I did in Taiwan was hit the gym. My friend was nice enough to treat me to the gym, and I hit chest and back. Malnutrition, lack of rest, and high humidity made it hard to put up the weight, but it was great to be back in a gym after nearly a month and a half of not lifting. I met quite a few friendly locals at the gym that really took lifting seriously, even more serious than the bros in Guangzhou did.

Adjacent to the gym was an Olympic-sized pool that we spent quite a bit of time in. It had been almost a decade since I had gotten into a pool, and I was never the best swimmer, but I still had a good time. In fact, this experience makes me want to swim more back in the States. I suppose that this is a minor example of how traveling is not just about seeing new places, but also about discovering new things yourself or adding new things to your repertoire.

Another thing that I learned in Taiwan was to appreciate simplicity. My friend lives up in the mountains of Miaoli County, removed from the hustle and bustle of Taipei (although close enough to Miaoli to have some convenience), so for the most part, things were quiet and serene. I learned to appreciate living without being wasteful, and even subsisted on a semi-vegan diet. These are lessons that will remain with me in America (hopefully I will be able to use them to save more money and expedite my return to Asia).

I might not need to save too much though, because the living expenses in Taiwan are relatively cheap. Food is very affordable, even moreso than in Mainland (on top of being more agreeable with my digestive system), and if you like bubble tea (some of you may know it as boba), then you owe it to yourself to take a trip to the place that it originated. In California, a boba would cost me about five dollars, but in Taiwan, it only cost me thirty, with thirty Taiwanese Dollars being the rough equivalent of one U.S. Dollar at the time of this writing.

I found Taiwanese people to be quite friendly and helpful in general, and despite all that I had heard, I did not get many stares (maybe they all stared at me when my head was turned). Speaking Japanese may also come in handy in Taiwan if your Mandarin is not up to par as well. Many times when a person that I was trying to speak to could not speak English, we found a happy medium in Japanese since my Mandarin is garbage.

Wanting to extend my time in Asia, I decided to go for another “Hail Mary”. I applied for jobs in Taiwan, and linked up with another friend of mine that was an exchange student at my high school. Her father assisted me in trying to find employment as an English teacher in the township of Yuanlin. Unfortunately, I did not get the job, and to be honest, there is a possibility that race played a factor in this. Given the numerous anecdotes that I have read and conversations with a colleague of mine that has taught there, I would not doubt it, but the positive experiences that I had in Taiwan more than make up for this defeat.

All in all, my time in the ROC was satisfying, and I would like to return as soon as I can in order to explore more of what the nation has to offer. At the very least, I am sure that I can indulge in affordable, quality electronics and barbecue brushes!

Misery Does Indeed Love Company

One lesson that has been driven home by perusing manosphere blogs and forums is that misery does love company. It seems like there is always some loser that either doesn't put in the work, constantly focuses on negativity, or were given an unfortunate genetic curse to the point that it is hopeless for them to attract women. While it is understandably difficult to cheer on others (especially others that may be adversaries) when one is losing, these specimens go out of their way to drag others into misery along with them. They will attack OPs that speak of their success (which is typically ineffective), or target neophytes that are trying to improve their game or take notes from successful people.

Essentially, what these miserable incel trolls do is take advantage of easy prey. Looking at one such example, the now-defunct PUAHate.com, they were doing the exact same thing that they accused PUAs of doing: taking advantage of weak, vulnerable men that were unable to get any. The only difference was that while the PUAs may try to cash in by selling a bill of goods, the PUAHate brigade tried to completely destroy other men's chances in order to feel better about themselves while being virtually surrounded by others wallowing in misery.

There certainly is strength in numbers, so it is natural for people that face the same problems to join up and discuss their issues together. However, when these groups are only whining about the issues without trying to form an effective plan of action to deal with them, one must question the group. Such groups are not worth joining or dealing with and are best avoided. We see such parties in a variety of settings, be it aggrieved communities, social justice Tumblrs, and even on forums from those that are venerated as Alpha males. Yours truly is also guilty of doing this, and I am trying my best not to fall into this trap again.

When someone tries to crush your spirits or encourage you to join them in their tearful circle jerks, it is best to ignore them and continue upon your own path. This is not to say that grievances should be ignored, but it is to say that people that have no solution to deal with these grievances, and only want additional people to cry without taking any proper action towards solving the problem are best avoided.

Why You Should See Every Day As Christmas

Originally posted on Return of Kings on December 2, 2014. You can read the original post here: link.

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When I was but a wee lad, my father would often say that every day is Christmas when the holiday season rolled around. In my youth, I did not understand since there were no daily presents, no Christmas specials being aired year-round, no tree that stayed up beyond New Year's, and it was back to school once the two weeks of winter break were over. It was not until recently that I truly realize what my father meant, and how this principle applies to life.

Every Day is Special, and No Day is Special

Some people tell us to live each day as if it were our last. This conflicts with the sensible approach of planning for the future, but they do have a point. We never know when our time will come to leave this plain of existence, so while we are here, we should make the most of the time that we do have. Do not wait until the holidays or special days to show appreciation for your loved ones, but instead show appreciation through your daily actions.

This also applies to actions that we would take to show appreciation to ourselves. No, I am not trying to tell you to treat yourself to a decadent triple latte like some Sex in the City character or overweight feminist blogger, but I am encouraging you to build yourself daily. Why wait until New Year's Day to make your resolutions when you know that you need to change your habits immediately. Do not hesitate when it comes to taking actions that will improve your lot in life. Even if you do not perish, opportunities are not guaranteed to always be available, so they should be pounced upon whenever possible. Do not wait until a holiday to talk to that cute girl; talk to her now if you get the chance to. Do not get caught up in holiday sales that generally aren't really good deals and waste your time standing in line; get what you need to get when you need it and can afford it.

Utilize Each Day to the Fullest

Yes, Christmas and other holidays are days off from work, but the work that you must do towards your own personal development does not stop when you clock out. Too many of us use these days to be slothful or engage only in leisure activities. Of course, it is great to enjoy yourself and to enjoy your time off, but the world will keep moving on, leaving you behind. We should do something to improve ourselves each and every day that we are allotted. Holidays are some of the better days to develop ourselves, actually, since we do not have to worry about clocking in for our bosses. Instead, we can spend that extra hour at the gym (if it's closed, we can go for a run or do calisthenics), read a few chapters in those personal development books, catch up on articles on various websites, and so on.

This is something that the advertisers and retailers know. Advertisements do not stop for the holidays; in fact, they ramp up. If businesses can do it, then why can't we? The grind never stops. Even when you are sleeping, your body is recuperating and repairing to be able to take on the next day. Just because it is Christmas, Kwanzaa, Golden Week, the Dragon Boat Festival, Fat Shaming Week, or even Christian Love Day doesn't mean that the world comes to a standstill, so we shouldn't either.

Holidays are Losing Their Luster

Okay, this probably isn't what my father meant, but it is something that I have been noticing. Maybe I have just become a humbug after becoming an adult, maybe it is a shift in cultural trends, or maybe it is a combination of these factors or other factors, but based on what I have been seeing, Western holidays seem to have lost their meanings. For most people that I know, holidays are just days where they don't have to go to work, or have to run around from store-to-store spending hours of their time and dipping into their savings to purchase decorations and gifts. This really hit home when I spent Christmas in Japan a few years back and noticed all of the Christmas decorations in a country where less than one percent of the population claims to adhere to the religion of Christianity. It's just another aspect of Western culture that the Japanese people find “cool” to follow, I suppose, and another way for international companies to make more money. (As a side note, it is also a great day to pick up in Japan).

No matter where we are or what set of holidays are celebrated in our countries of residence, we should seek to develop ourselves constantly, show appreciation to the people in our lives that deserve it everyday, not overindulge in consumerism or sloth, and not wait until designated special days to complete tasks or make necessary changes in our lives. Happy Holidays to you and yours, and remember to stay on the grind.

New Years Resolutions

So 2014 is coming to a close and we are about to enter 2015. Some people will be making resolutions for the new year, but personally, I will pass on this. I have already set my goals and I have already started moving towards them. I urge you, dear readers, to do the same. There is nothing "special" about making New Year's resolutions that will make them come any truer than if you were to start today, and the sooner you begin, the sooner you can reach your goals and set new ones.

On a personal note, my goals going into 2015 are to study more, gain at least five pounds of muscle mass, eat healthier, and get laid more often without lowering my standards. I have started getting to work on all of these goals now (except for the latter one since there are few women that I am attracted to in my locale, but the other goals will help towards this goal once I have returned to Asia).

I am also announcing a hiatus from blogging until February, since my schedule is going to be packed and I won't be able to do much writing. I still have a couple of articles uploaded that will be released later this week and the first week of January. I'll see you in February, and I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors, of course, provided that they do not run contrary to my own.

Happy New Year.

Good Things Come to Those Who Persist, Not Those Who Wait

Adages such as “Good things come to those who wait” and “Patience is a virtue” are often told to children to instill patience in them (or just to get them to stop whining about a long car trip or the wait for the Holiday season). While patience can indeed be a good quality to have, it is a rare case to see someone actually get somewhere by sitting around and waiting all of their lives. Too many people apply a saying that was used to get us to wait for toys or pipe down on a long road trip to finding success in life.

The proper saying that we should apply to our lives is “Good things come to those who persist.” What this means is that we might not get to where we are going the first time that we try. We may fail miserably as we learn our crafts, but continuous practice will help us to develop our skills. Continuous work, and getting on our grinds will be our paths to reaching our goals. There is no time to sit on our laurels; we must dust ourselves off, lean from our failures rather than constantly lament them, and continue on our endeavors.

There are many reasons why one may believe otherwise. For me, my counselors in high school as well as my Christian upbringing convinced me that if I jumped through all of the hoops that I was supposed to and waited, that society or GodJesus would rewards me. Get your bachelor's degree, go to church, don't fornicate, and say your prayers brother, and life will be alright, and if it isn't you will go to Heaven when you die and it will be pretty sweet to sit around worshiping GodJesus and the Bear forever and ever. Boy were they wrong. My life did not start getting better for me until I decided to get up, consistently strive to better myself (mind and body), see the world, and see the world for what it really is. Oh, and fornicating has made my life better too.

Do not let others tell you to keep waiting when you know that it takes action to get where you want to go. Yes, rash decisions and actions can lead to disaster, but indecision and inaction will lead to certain stagnation. Make sure that you plan your approaches, but always move towards your goals every day that you are breathing.

Don't Waste Time with Unnecessary Battles

This page should redirect you to this post's new location, at General Quarters.

November Goals Assessment

To begin, I hope that everyone had a great Thanksgiving if you celebrate it, and I hope that you weren't separated from too much of your cash (or any of your limbs) on Black Friday. We have reached the end of the month, and it is time to look over the goals that we set on the first and see how we measured up.

Make $500 online

I only ended up making a fifth of this goal. I did, however, find other means to make income which should make this a much easier goal to reach by the close of the year.

Read One Personal Development Book

Another failure. I did not even crack open a personal development book this month since I became swamped with other information. there are no excuses for failure, but I am thrilled to report that the information that I have read will contribute greatly to my personal and financial development in the future.

Blog at Least Once a Week

If you have been following my blogs, you will know that I have succeeded with this goal, although most of my posts were on this blog here. My goal was only to blog at least once across all of my blogs, so this objective was completed. I am also ahead a bit in my writing, so I can take the first weeks of December a bit easier and focus on other things.

Regularly Comment on Other Blogs

Yet another failure. I did comment on other blogs, and I recently joined a social network (feel free to add me here) where I have been sharing links and interacting with a few other users, but I didn't complete my assigned task.

Looking at these goals, I have to say that I disappointed myself. Looking back at the month, however, I must say that it was an overall success and that my actions therein will open up new doors for me in the future. I will be recycling these goals next month with one modification: instead of trying to make $500 online, I only have to make an additional $500 by any legal means. I hope that you accomplished what you set out to do, and I wish you the best of luck next month. Let's finish the year strong.

Cast a Wider Net to Catch Your Prize

Rejection is a part of life that we will have to deal with at one time or another. It can effect us in just about every aspect of our lives: employment, dating, sex, entrepreneurship, you name it. Fear of being turned down, whether it is the fear of appearing weak or otherwise inferior, or fear that was developed after past rejections can stifle our personal development, and prevent us from reaching our goals in life.

Oftentimes, there is little that can be done. If a girl that you are after just does not want to be bothered with you, then you probably are not going to be able to do much to change her mind. If your business ideas are not getting the greenlight from certain investors, no matter how hard you pitch them, then you probably will not see a cent from them anytime soon. Does this mean that you should give up on dating, or throw away your ideas? Absolutely not! Instead of throwing in the towel, you should cast a wider net.

What this means is that you should always keep your options open, so that if you fail with one prospect, you have others to fall back on where you may succeed. For instance, if you are trying to pitch an idea to investors but you get shot down, that does not mean that you should kill your dreams. Instead, modify the idea or your pitch as much as you need to, and try to target other investors. If this does not work, you can fall back on crowdfunding, or a combination of these investment sources. Expanding your options makes it easier to find at least one source that will work for you.

The principle applies for girls. Now, this can be a hard thing to do depending on where you are as there might not be enough suitable women in your area (like in my hometown, especially given my preference), and that wide net might end up catching one big whale. In this case, you might have to relocate, or utilize online dating. If you are in an area where you have potential access to many attractive women, you will want to keep your options open with as many as possible. If a girl rejects you, then you can pick yourself up and talk to the next. If one flakes on you, then you can set up a night out (or a night in) with a different lady.

Knowing that options are available will help you to maintain your confidence, even after being hit by rejection. Cast your net as wide as you possibly can in order to increase your chances of success.

Hypocrisy and the Game of Power

When we are brought up as children, we are taught to do what is right and just for the benefit of society. In other words, we are taught to be moral. Growing up, we often encounter others that claim to do what is right, but behind closed doors (and sometimes, right in our faces) they will take action contrary to what they supposedly stand for. This is hypocrisy, and it is a major tool in the game of power in contemporary society.

Whether we are dealing with the White Nationalist that claims to promote racial purity, but cannot keep his mushroom tip out of Asian and Latin sugarwalls (all while telling the world that it is a sin for Black men to get any), the liberal social justice warrior (SJW) that claims to stand up for the equality of people with all sexual preferences, but slams the evil, cisgendered heterosexual male, or the preacher that tells his congregation to separate from their worldly possessions and tithe so that he can purchase a new Cadillac, we must be aware of the game that they are playing. You cannot deal with these types using logic, even their own logic, since they and their followers will strike you down. They do not care about following their paradigms and only wish to stifle you, mold you to fit their needs, or smash you as a competitor.

The hypocrite claims to play by the rules, and in some cases, may enforce the rules, but in reality, they break them while pointing out others to be scapegoats. Their prime targets are those that do wish to play the game by the rules and act right. Those that are overly conscious of breaking the rules, and those that are overly apologetic are easy victims of the hypocrite.

These days, it seems like everyone is a hypocrite. It is OK for them to take an action or make a statement, but if a member of the opposing team does the same thing, then it is evil, wrong, and the opposing party should be ashamed of themselves. There is no escaping this reality, for better or worse, so be mindful of it, and try to manipulate the playing field in your favor. If it is alright for them to take such actions, and they refuse to put an end to their lies, then feel free to use the same tactics for the benefit of your side of the conflict. Remember that mutual unfairness is as close to fair as life gets. When it comes to online arguments especially, it is best to simply ignore the hypocrite and go about your own way.

In real life, dealing with hypocrites is much more difficult since they may be in a position to take action that would have a direct effect upon our lives. If the offender has power over you, you may have to put up with the double standards, at least until you can attain power through other methods and end up on top. If you can, try to distance yourself from this entity. Keep in mind that power may give the offender a "halo effect" of sorts, making them look wholesome as they claim, while you are labeled as the bad guy. This simply illustrates the importance of gaining and keeping power for yourself.

A Catalyst Alone is Not Enough

In chemistry, a catalyst is a substance that increases that rate at which a chemical reaction takes place. In our day-to-day lives (aside from the chemical reactions taking place in our bodies and all around us), a catalyst can also be a person, thing, or event that causes us to take action or change ourselves. Some can be negative, such as financial hard times or deaths of people close to us, while others can be positive, like reading a motivational book (or blog post by yours truly), or meeting a successful person that you want to emulate, and others still may be neutral (or could ebb towards positive and negative depending on one's perspective) such as religion or the goals that we set. A any rate, catalysts light fires under our asses to make changes in our lives that we deem necessary to advance.

Once you have found your catalyst (or it has found you) and the fire has been lit, do not think that your life is in the bag. It is going to be up to you to kindle the fire into an inferno of self-improvement and development. There are many people that satiate themselves in self-help material or prayer, then wonder why their lives are not improving at all. This can be due to "paralysis by analysis", fear, downright laziness, or other causes, but if this behavior persists, one will find themselves right back in another rut.

 A catalyst on its own will not cause a chemical reaction; reactants are needed. In the case of your personal development, the "reactants" will be your passions, your goals, your visions, your skills, your work, and any other factor that will contribute to your success. These aspects must be cultivated and put in motion in order to find success since it will not fall out of the sky for most people, despite how many self-help books you have read, or prayers you have sent up to GodJesus, the Bear, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or my personal favorite:

Wake Up: It's the First of the Month

It's the first of the month, and that means that it is time to reassess your goals. If you made any New Year's resolutions back in January, then you still have two months to get back on track and try to make those changes. Let's try to finish this year strong.

Use whichever tactics you find necessary to get your goals done. These can be affirmations, setting higher goals and falling short at your real goal (or maybe even reaching your lofty goals, you never know), tackling your objectives piecemeal, or whatever other methods you may have to keep your targets in mind and get things done.

My personal goals for this month are as follows:

Make $500 Online

This can be by freelancing, from ad revenue, or other means, as long as I make $500 or more. This money will go towards my travel to China next year and should not be touched for any other reason.

Read One Personal Development Book

I want to read at least one personal development book from cover to cover this month. It may be a shorter e-book, but I at least want to finish one as long as it provides information that can help me out in my life.

Blog at Least Once a Week

It looks like I am already off to a good start with this goal. I want to write at least one blog post per week, either on this blog, my fitness blog, or my tech and gaming blog.

Regularly Comment on Other Blogs

I hope to communicate more with other bloggers in my niches, so I will be commenting on more blogs this month. I plan to comment at least five times a week on different blogs.

I will be keeping these goals in mind all month and striving to accomplish them. I urge you to do the same, then reflect upon your progress at the end of the month. Let's finish strong, people.

The Importance of Education

Recently, manosphere writer Matt Forney released an article on Return of Kings giving reasons why men should not attend college. He states that college is an expensive waste of time, and that young men will be bombarded by feminism and blamed for all of the ills in society. I agree that college is a business these days, and like all businesses, the primary objective is for universities to make money, not necessarily train the best and the brightest that our generation has to offer. I also agree that young men are subjected to feminism day-in and day-out from kindergarten to twelfth, and it does not end in college. To top things off, if you are a Black man and aren't going to an HBCU, you can expect to catch hell for being a man and if there is a conservative backlash, don't think that they're going to have your interests in mind, as you will likely be labeled as a liberal that only got in because of affirmative action (you probably won't do too well with the ladies either unless you are an athlete).

All of that being said, I still cannot say that I am against education. Education is vital to success, but college is not necessarily the right path of education for everyone. There are alternatives such as trades, mentors, and good old fashioned experience.

Throughout my formative years, teachers as well as my parents would tell me about the importance of getting a college education. By the time I got to college, I thought that I would learn everything that I needed to in order to be successful in life, and I thought that getting my degree would open doors to guaranteed and lucrative employment. I am here to tell you that I thought wrong. I have never once worked a "real job" using what I have learned in college, and the freelance gigs that I have done that would fall under the subject of my major were all completed with skills learned on my own.

Now, do I regret going to college and earning my bachelor's degree? Absolutely not. It is something to put down on a resume, and looks great when you want to work for other people. More importantly for me, it, along with a TEFL certificate (and I suppose being lucky enough to have been born and raised in one of the “Big Five” English-speaking countries), has been a ticket for me to teach English overseas. My regrets revolve around being stagnant and thinking that a degree would be my ticket to financial security.

Should you decide to go to college, I urge you to study your subject thoroughly outside of the confines of the classroom. Your assignments are great for learning the basics of your subject, but if you want to dig deep, you are going to have to do the hard work yourself. Look up resources online or spend time at the library studying your craft. Talk to experienced people in your major, or even your professors as they may be able to provide you with additional information. Being the shy introvert that I was in college, I would spend all of my time alone doing enough to pass my core classes (with A's), but would not do much beyond that to truly learn or communicate ideas with others. Even if you decide not to go to college, this is a great way to learn, and I find myself studying more now, even after I have graduated than I did when I was enrolled at the university.

I might also add that you should try to be well-rounded, or at least capable of socializing. Learn a few things outside of your major, even if it's just picking apart the arguments of all of the feminists in those multicultural language arts classes that they force you to take, even though you're going to be a super-duper code monkey. This may sound contradictory, but you should also keep in mind that while wanting to get laid is perfectly natural and healthy, despite what some of your professors or some social clubs on campus may try to tell you, remember that your objective is to learn, get your degree, and get out as soon as possible so that you do not waste time or rack up a huge debt.

The conclusion that I have come to is that learning is indeed a lifelong endeavor. It does not stop after high school or college, and it does not exist only within the confines of traditional academia. No matter what path you choose, you are always going to have to study and practice in order to stay on top of the game; this goes back to what I said about “always beplayin'”. Utilize any resources or connections that you may have in order to perfect your craft and learn new things. This is the reality behind the importance of education.

Do Affirmations Actually Work?

Affirmations are thoughts that are spoken aloud in order to change one's mindset. New Age self-help gurus and their followers often state that verbalizing affirmations will help a person to reach their goals in life. For instance, stating that you have gained twenty pounds of muscle each morning while looking in the mirror should result in you making those muscular gains.

Is there a mystical, magical realm where your words become a reality? Is there a second dimension with mystical beings that will make sure that your dreams become a reality? Do affirmations connect you with GodJesus or some greater spiritual consciousness that will make the world suddenly work in your favor?

Some may spout affirmations daily like they should, but nothing ever happens. They find themselves further and further away from accomplishing their goals. As life passes them by, and their bodies, minds, and skills atrophy, they wonder why they are not where they should be; the magic of affirmations failed them.

I am here to tell you that affirmations are not magic, and simply stating what you want while imagining that you are where you want to be in the future is not going to bring results. Does this mean that you should completely forget about affirmations? No, not at all. I just want you to realize that affirmations alone are not going to get you to where you want to be (assuming that your goals go beyond just reciting affirmations). Verbal affirmations can be quite useful for lifting your spirits or keeping you motivated. This boost of morale and self-motivation can get you in gear to take actions towards your goals. The actions themselves are what will get you to your objectives.

Personally, I have been using affirmations from time to time, and they have helped to stave off negative thoughts and put my mindset in a frame to do what needs to be done to complete my missions in life. If you think that affirmations will help you along the road of personal development and towards your goals, then by all means employ them. They can be a great way to boost and maintain morale. Just remember that you need to get the work done if you want to succeed.

Stop Living Vicariously Through Others

In today's society, we are inundated with images of successful people. These are typically celebrities and athletes, but they may also be people that you encounter on social networks. We see this all of the time on manosphere blogs and forums, where commentators almost seem to get a rise from the exploits of others. There is nothing wrong with giving props where they are due, and nothing wrong with admiring or learning from someone that has succeeded where you want to, but the problem that I am seeing is people that go through their lives praising the accomplishments of others to get a rise in their otherwise unfulfilled lives.

The OPs, Alphas, celebrities, and so on are making their money. They're getting their püh. They're traveling the globe and enjoying themselves, all while those that are living vicariously continue to age, stay in the same neighborhoods that they grew up in, waste hours and hours online singing the praises of others and helping them finance their lifestyles while going into deeper and deeper debt. Those that get their jollies riding the bandwagon of others (at least when it comes to celebrity worship) do not really get anything of their own in the long run.

Throughout most of my life, I have lived vicariously through the accomplishments of others. I would praise celebrities like Floyd Mayweather, and each time that he fought and won, it would be a victory for me as a Black man. There is a degree of truth to that given the way that the media works, but I was not making any of the money that Floyd was making, and after the excitement of the fight was over, it was still a lonely Saturday night for me where I would try to find clips of Black men banging Asian women and frig myself vicariously to them. I spent little time trying to better my mindset so that I could take on the world and have victories of my own. If Floyd would have lost, I would have been crushed, as I would have had nothing at all to be proud of. Don't get me wrong, I would still like to see Mayweather retire undefeated, but if he does get an "L" on his record, I will still have my life to live and my endeavors to reach.

Win or lose, I will win for myself.

Instead of trying to live off of the accomplishments of others, I have decided to set forth and accomplish what I want to get done with my life. I advice you all to do the same. Turn off the video games if your level 99 warlock isn't helping you to cast spells or make money in real life. Cut off the porn because you're not banging those girls. Click off the TV, hit the gym and get swole yourself because you didn't just score that touchdown. I'm not saying that you cannot cheer for your favorite team or athlete, or indulge yourself in entertainment from time to time, but just make sure that you are growing and building yourself so that when it is all over, you can say that you actually did something with your life other than just riding the jock of others.

Oneitis: Still a Problem in the West

Throughout history, there have been several epidemics. The Plague, the Spanish Flu, AIDS, and Ebola (which was foolishly brought to the United States) all come to mind. There is one more ailment that effects otherwise healthy men, it is known as Oneitis.

The primary symptom of Oneitis is obsessive feelings over one woman. This is not to be confused with fidelity in a relationship with a woman that deserves it, or the loyalty that a functional marriage would have. Instead, it is characterized by loyalty and devotion to a woman that does not reciprocate it, or feigns it to drain a man of his resources. It may also lead to a man being inhibited from making moves in his life, whether they be romantic, financial, or otherwise, all to please this so-called special person. In this article, we will discuss some of the main causes of Oneitis.

Fear

Fear is one of the biggest causes of Oneitis. The fear of losing the interest of that “special” girl can cause men to take actions that are self-destructive, or not take actions that are beneficial. Oftentimes, the “special” girl does not find the afflicted man to be special at all, and it follows that the interest was never there in the first place. The man wastes away (or at least wastes his time) with pursuits that are non-beneficial.

Self-doubt may also cause a man to believe that he cannot attract other women. A bird in hand is worth two in the bush, as they say, but many times, the birds in hand are mangy pigeons rather than juicy chickens. These men will end up living lives lacking of sexual fulfillment, while being browbeaten by their ever-fattening counterparts.

Religion

Most religions teach us that fornication is wrong, and that we should seek one mate to spend the rest of our lives with. Perhaps this worked in the past, but in today's world of hypergamy and hypersexuality, these notions just do not hold. Even within the houses of religion, there is plenty of hanky-panky going on. The same preacher that teaches you to find one suitable wife is probably popping multiple women in the church, using his supposed spiritual authority to get in women's draws. He may also be splashing more than holy water on the choirboys too.

Lack of Growth

When we are children, we watch movies and read books about princes and princesses falling in love and living happily ever after. If we are lucky, we had two loving parents that supported each other. However, in today's world, there comes a time when we grow up and realize that we were lied to by the stories, and what worked for our parents might not work for us in contemporary society, for better or for worse.

Some men believe that despite all that they see around them, that there is indeed one special person made especially for them. There is a sense of justice, and no matter how many times the princess turns them down, the prince knows that he will will win her heart. Unfortunately, the only winning here is the princess taking resources from Prince Beta while getting the diugh from King Alpha.

Lack of Suitable Women

In some locations, there is a very real lack of suitable women, whether it is because the women in an area are all unattractive, or a man lacks the properties necessary to attract decent women. In the first case, the young men will naturally vie for the affections of the rare good-looking women in the area. In the latter case, a young man may devote himself entirely to the solitary female that gives him an ounce of attention.

Now that we have gone over some of the symptoms and causes of Oneitis, let's briefly discuss potential cures. Mary Poppins said that “a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down”; in the case of this ailment, spooning out some sugarwalls is the medicine itself. See other women, and after you've busted a few good nuts, see if the princess still enchants you. A change of mindset may also be in order. Try to see the world for what it really is rather than living completely in idealism. Finally, make sure that you don't give your all to a woman that gives you nothing or only leads you on. In the future, I will talk about my bout with Oneitis and how I cured myself of it.

Always Be Playin'

One of the books that I read while I was in China instead of studying Chinese like I should have been was The 50th Law by Robert Greene, author of The 48 Laws of Power and many other personal development books. The 50th Law uses examples from the life of famous rapper, 50 Cent, as well as historical figures to illustrate important themes in the game of power. One of these lessons that I have learned and continuously try to implement in my life is found in Chapter 4 of the book: Keep Moving.

This chapter conveys the importance of constant motion. When one stagnates, they miss opportunities, but if one is constantly working towards a goal, even if they feel as if they are on top, then they can push further ahead and better secure their position from would-be adversaries. In other words, "Always Be Playin'". Although the way this is phrased sounds like it applies to gaming girls, this philosophy applies to just about any arena of life.

For instance, you might have a great job with an amazing salary, but you must remember that when you work for others, you are essentially expendable. There will always be someone else that can do your job and do it for less money, which means that you never know when a younger, more ambitious, or perhaps more willing rival will arrive to push you out of your job. However, if you know that you should "always be playin'", then you might apply for other jobs based on your experience. Even if you do not take these jobs, you might gain contacts in your back pocket just in case you need them, or at the very least, keep your interview skills fresh and potentially improve your confidence. Taking things a step further, you may choose to pursue entrepreneurial endeavors in order to develop skills and have alternative modes of income.

"Always be playin'" applies to the mind as well. As we get older, our mind tends to stagnate as we get set in our ways and the curiosity that we once had as children fades. Some of us may have been praised at a young age (deservingly or not in the Western world), which while good for building confidence and self-esteem, can actually stifle personal development. Thinking that we are entitled "know-it-alls" and that our ways are the only ways, especially when there is no power to back these claims, can lead to ruin. Instead of going down this path, one should open their mind to new ideas and opportunities.

Stay abreast of new developments, be they technological, economic, social, etc. on a global scale, then strike when the opportunity presents itself, or at the very least prepare yourself to deal with the "new world" that will emerge from these developments.

Lessons from China: Step Outside of Your Comfort Zone

Although I failed to learn Chinese during my stint in China over the summer, I did learn and relearn some important life lessons there. The most important lesson that I learned was that one must leave their comfort zone in order to unveil and capitalize off of opportunities.

This does not mean that one has to leap directly into the danger zone, but taking a few steps outside of the box, especially for starters, can open up new worlds. In my case, going to China in the first place was a step outside of my comfort zones of Japan and the United States (comfortably numb in the case of the latter). The next step was to open up to people, despite language barriers and racial barriers (both real and perceived).

The Danger Zone

This somewhat more outgoing approach to life lead to numerous opportunities (mostly chances to drink or get laid, but I won't complain about that), and numerous friendships that may develop into more profitable relationships in the future. In order to profit, one must be able to reach people, and one way to reach people is to venture out into the world and get to know people.

Of equal, or perhaps greater importance is stepping outside of your mental comfort zone. Many people have been mentally conditioned for failure for a variety of reasons. Some of us have been so thoroughly conditioned that failure becomes a habit. We seek sources to justify our failures, such as sob forums like the now-defunct PUAHate, and consistently put ourselves down, making our lives even more miserable and the lives of our competitors easier. This is a habit that I am trying to cast off completely.

This is not to say that life does not have obstacles, but if we do not take that step forward, we will never be able to surmount the obstructions that life may throw at us, instead staying stagnant as life passes us by. In order to change my mindset, I have begun a program of serious study. This includes studying those that have succeeded in realms that I wish to succeed in, as well as reflecting on my past experiences and comparing notes with those in similar situations that are seeking solutions to common problems.

I have not reached all of my short-term goals yet, but I am a few steps closer to doing so. I am also more open to and aware of opportunities that present themselves. I hope that those of you reading this are willing to take that first step out of the comfort zone towards your objectives.