As many of you may know, I am a Black American man, and I have spent time living in both Japan and China. The dating scenes in both countries are much different for Black men than they are for other races, as I have mentioned before, and I would like to talk about some generalities that I have noticed in both types of women. For this first post, I will be talking about race and objectification, on both ends of the relationship. Most of this is going to be based on my personal experiences, so others may or may not experience these same things.
Japanese Girls
Black men who have traveled to Asia often say that Japanese women like Black men. I would say that compared to other countries in the region, there are more Japanese women that fantasize about and actively seek out Black men as their first choice, but this is still a minority within a minority of women, and based on what I have been hearing, a dwindling minority.
I must also add that most Japanese girls that like Black men want a particular type of Black man. They tend to either want the stereotype from hip-hop videos, or they want a guy that looks like the Black men that most often appear on advertisements there: tall, cleanly-shaven head, and muscular. Granted, I had very little game and certainly did not have a physique that I could be proud of when I was in Japan (a trio of Japanese girls that I met at Hong Kong International seemed more receptive of me after my development), the way that some Black men talked about how it was easy made it seem like we were doing as well as white guys out there; this simply was and is not the case. I still say that it is the best place to find Northeast Asian women that specifically have a Black fetish, but most of those girls are not my style.
I was objectified as the "Black boyfriend" of some of the Japanese girls that I dated. I was treated almost like a new piece of clothing or jewelry that they would show off to their friends, on top of being a bestial living dildo and entertainer (the latter which I failed at).
On the other hand, Japanese women would also play up to their stereotypes in a bid to turn me on (not talking about the hardcore "B-Style" girls that would try to act like Black stereotypes and coax that behavior out of me). Japanese girls that I have been with were indeed "ladies on the streets and freaks in the bed" that would squeal just like your favorite JAV star upon penetration. They also spoke Japanese during the act, and if I told them a few things in Japanese, it would drive them over the edge. They almost universally liked it fast, rough, and hard, and one of my buddies out there claims that he found plenty of girls that were into cosplaying with their high school uniforms, which they kept just for the occasion. One thing that I also found odd about Japanese women was that many of them wanted to be my first Japanese girl.
Chinese Girls
China is a harder nut to crack (or bust), and just being Black is more likely to be a turnoff than a turn-on for Chinese women. However, with adequate effort and a bit of luck, it is possible for a Black man to succeed with the local women. If you are targeting bigger cities, you may also find a few Black-fetishists, but the general population will likely be harder to click with due to the cosmopolitan image of whites and greater competition due to the higher number of foreigners. Most of the Chinese women that I dealt with probably did not go to bed with fantasies of Black men, but when we happened upon each other, they were intrigued by me (being an American and being able to teach them English and offer a green card in the back of their mind probably helped to be honest).
Given the exposure that China has had to Black people in the media, I'd guess that most Chinese girls that specifically like Black men would want a taller man that looks like he could play for the NBA in their eyes. However, some everyday Chinese girls were open to me (maybe they heard of Muggsy Bogues), and not fitting all Black stereotypes did not seem to be a negative out there at all. That is not to say that they don't have stereotypes (athletic, savage in the sack, and the ubiquitous big dick), but those along with speaking English and being an American citizen are things that are at least somewhat true of me, rather than stereotypical ideas of "swag" and what-have-you. This is one of the reasons why I have begun preferring Chinese women to Japanese women.
When dating and hooking up with Chinese women, yes, it was acknowledged that I was a Black man/foreigner, and that they were Chinese, but I was "Admiral", a person, at least to some of the girls. To others, I was just a living dildo, a guilty pleasure that they would dare not tell their friends about, unlike the Japanese girls that saw me as their new fashion accessory. I have also been their free English teacher, window to the world, and a specimen to be studied.
Chinese women did not play up their "Chinese-ness" for the most part during any part of the relationships, aside from usual things that might come up such as the cultural significance of an image, language, and other little tidbits of culture. When making love, they actually preferred to speak English if at all, and their moans did not sound like squeaking toys. I would say that compared to Japanese, Chinese women are more likely to be crass in public, but prudish in bed, that is unless you get them going or they really like you, then they can be freakier than Japanese (although easier to tire out, it seems). They would also tell me to go slow, and we would build up a tempo together rather than going straight to the hard-pumping action (that is not to say that I didn't put the ramma-jamma on those walls, or that there weren't Chinese girls that could slam themselves on my pelvis though). Ultimately, sex with Chinese women has been more passionate than with Japanese women, as odd as this may sound. Chinese women also seemed relieved when they found out that they were not my first Chinese sex partner, even if they hinted at exclusivity.
At the end of the day, races and cultures can be lumped together as groups, and there are many times where it may feel like you are dealing with clones, but individuals are indeed individuals, so your mileage may vary.
